Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Weasel Bites Stoat

As promised , Anthony Watts can henceforth stoop to censorship only at risk of seeing the scientific criticism that dismays him linked or reprinted here.

 Witness this :

http://scienceblogs.com/stoat/2012/02/comments_elsewhere_part_ii.php#comments

Wednesday, February 8, 2012

WHEN DID MONCKTON LOSE HIS SHIRT ?

I write to endorse a product that has provided perfect satisfaction for two decades.

Though  Christopher Monckton has contributed nothing to science, held no office of state, and been denied a seat in the House of Lords, he remains a worthy liveryman of the Worshipful Company of Broderers, and his phenomenal gifts of  embroidery are as evident in his shirts as his mightily padded resume'


In 1996,  I did not realize  that Monckton of Brenchley was the Monckton on Monckton shirt collars, but the enduring quality of their cotton proves that climate balderdashery's gain has been haberdashery's loss. Let us wish Christopher Monckton a swift return to his true calling.

The Race Is Not Always To The Swift

Welcome to the website of The Special Climate Olympics!

To make the climate wars accessible to the Differently Facted and Otherwise Educated, from K to 12, the Committee has organized a variety of simple mental and physical challenges for individual bloggers and think tank teams. Since many consider science a religion, this Special Olympiad is open to Communitarians, Evangelicals,  Discovery Institute stakeholders, Vouduns Vertes, Unorthodox Zarthus & other carbon-offset fire worshipers, Young Earth Scientologists, and members of The Church of the Singularity of the Latter Day Saints, better known as the Nanomormons.

Venues
The traditional Climate Tug of War,  will center on the East Pole Olympic Village, EPOV on Ghana’s Prime Meridian Coast.


Directions to EPOV
Simply follow old London Olympics, signs to Greenwich and turn your amphibious vehicle south  on the Prime Meridian, and follow road signs and  Admiralty charts  until you arrive at the Equator

To reduce the carbon footprint of stadium lighting and ensure the participation of the Calendrically Challenged, the Special Winter Climate Olympics will be held in midsummer on the Greenland Icecap, or the adjacent Arctic sea ice, if there is any.

Cable TV sponsorship is sought for the following events.

The Dryathelon
Competitors face the tactical problem of pursuing a polar bear across Greenland’s new dunes on sand skis to shoot it before it succumbs to anthropogenic drought induced thirst.

Narwhal Lawn Darts 
This ambitious amphibious sport replaces the last Special Climate Olympiad's quadriplegic harpooning event. In it, athletes strive to fling a beached pod of the cetaceans far enough out of the water to stick upright in the sand on their unicorn-like horns.

The Solyndra House Of The Rising Sun Challenge Cup

In this event contestants attempt to negotiate a vertical glass solar collector wall to avoid incineration by the ascending image of the rising sun. Open to alternative energy lobbyists handicapped in proportion to their moral stature.

The Moulin Blues
This extreme ice water sport features two water polo teams vying to score goals before they are sucked into the deep aquamarine vortex draining a melt water lake atop the Greenland icecap.

The Eskimo Hockey Stick Toss

In this exciting variant on an old Native American sport, a two-meter square of rubber graph paper is stretched between four hockey sticks and used to trampoline a TV weatherman skyward towards the tropopause. The first contestant to asphyxiate wins.

The Great Isotherm Race.
In this signature event for the Terminally Othered, dysrophic contestants try to chin their wheelchairs Poleward as fast as the rate of AGW isotherm migration across the 5 km course. Starting gun 21 June, finish expected in time for closing  awards ceremony of 2024 Boston Olympics

Concessions

To promote a high carbon capture lifestyle, food concessions at this Olympiad will feature salt and sugar-free fossil foods, like fresh-fracked anthracite, and lignite smoothies,

Bernstein’s Real Amber Ale, brewed from real Baltic amber will be available in the pub.

VVivat !

Having lost his place on TV, weatherman Anthony Watts has created a blog that qualifies as  a sort of stupor mundi, a haven for serial crackpottery by the thermodynamically challenged,  congregated in the service of commercial disinformation and political self-deceit.

Its name, half pun and half-plagiarised from SNL's least funny skit, has come to signify  petty censorship and sustained hypocrisy of Vice Presidential amperage.

This website represents its antithesis, a venue for the ventilation of climate bloggerell that has sunk low enough to qualify as scientific comedy of manners.

We apologize for the webmonkeying in progress, and invite cooperation to improve its design as it moves towards functional status. It would be wonderful were some public spirited South Pacific ubergeek to forward with software to automatically translate comments based on cargo cult science into pidgin. Until it does our comment policy will consist  exclusively in running any  comments substantive or critical that WUWT censors or refuses.

Stay tuned for further developments.