Saturday, July 12, 2014

HE MAKETH ME TO LIE DOWN IN GREEN PASTURES


The intellectual calm of Las Vegas' was shattered last week as the spirit moved  a dour Calvinist divine of strong Dominionist views, to invade the Mandalay Bay Casino not to denounce that deeply shocking den of iniquity, but earn an honorarium for baptising one of the Lord's preterite scientific sheep as 2014's
Reverend  Calvin Beisner, Th D, a dominie of
er, I mean the  Cornwall Alliance for the Stewardship of  Creation,  did the honors at a  Heartland Institute  revival meeting  International Climate Conference. The honoree was the  Wrong-Way Corrigan of the Climate Wars, Dr. Roy Spencer, who with fellow evangelist  John Christy preached the gospel of  negative global satellite temperature trends, an exegesis deeper study of The Book Of Nature compelled them to retract in Science in 2005.  Also pontificating was Brit Ćœbertwit James Delingpole, who introduced an Austrian climate rapper as the event's hallelujah chorus.

At the conclusion of  the Calvinist Coolist Conclave , the Heartlandite brethren migrated down the Vegas Strip like an exodus of Mormons fleeing Sodom for Gomorrah,  to arrive the this year's Libertarian Freedomfest, where Delingpole offered  this wholesome perspective on Vegas as an uplifting  Evangelical convention venue:



"Great God, Vegas is an awful place... Everyone was fat and drunk and dressed for the beach... Everywhere had the style and charm and tastefulness of Redditch...
you can only survive Vegas if you learn to love it-- and to do that you must first sell it your soul... The reason I was there was to cover two conferences: first the Heartland Institute’s Climate Conference ... by day, I interviewed gold bugs, Ayn Rand junkies, Mises groupies and celebrities like Steve Forbes and P.J. O’Rourke. At night, I got totally wasted and had adventures.
My favourite was a trip to the Strip, the low-rent end of Vegas, where the clientele is poorer and trashier and the whores skankier... The tackier the better, really, because the more depraved and messed up everyone else looks, the less discomfited you are by your own growing squalor ...
Stage a conference of libertarians, pot-legalisers, gun nuts and gold bugs in a city of booze, whores, gambling and semi-automatics:What could possibly go wrong?"