Monday, June 29, 2015

VISCOUNT DISCOUNTS RUN FOR ANTIPOPE AFTER KLEIN WIN

Lord  Monckton's  clerk  reports the  viscount is  resting  comfortably after  excommunicating  himself in the aftermath of dark horse candidate Naomi Klein's win in UKIP's  surprise Antipapal election.

After delivering his  canonization  concession speech and a brief eulogy to Sir Christopher Lee on the steps of the Vatican Observatory:


the former shirtmaker said: 'This changes nothing', and announced he would throw his  coronet  hat in  the  ring to seek nomination as Imperial Chancelor of the Sith and Editor of  The Daily Telegraph in  next  year's  Iowa caucus.

Saturday, June 20, 2015

SOLITARY , GREENISH , NASTY AND SHORT


In focusing on the plight of the poor, Pope Francis' climate crusade ignores a grave consequence of energy impoverishment:

Laudatio Si  fails to mention that life in Low Carbon Emission Nations tends to be short. 


Every part per million annual increase in CO2 requires the global burning of fuel enough to produce three quarters of a tonne of CO2 per capita. Many nations exceed this criterion-- Americans emit over 20 tonnes each, Israelis 10, and even  though handicapped by Gaulist nuclear electricity, the French manage to consume a respectable 6 tonnes of fossil carbon a year.
Some states take Earth Day more seriously. The Vatican, at least in theory, became the first carbon-neutral nation in 2008,  by offsetting its emissions with wholesale acrorn planting in Hungary and Rumania. 

But if UNEP is to be believed, Christendom faces hot competition from paynimry. Some green banner waving Muslims  in belt extending  from Afghanistan to Somalia burn less fossil fuel in a lifetime than Europeans or Americans do in a year.

The citizens of  some proud LCEN's appear to exhale more CO2 than they produce by burning fossil fuels, and they carry the Green banner  even farther forward by limiting  lifetime emissions: Least Carbon Emitting Nation citizens drop dead decades earlier  than residents of  lands afflicted with more materialistic lifestyles.  

                    CO2 per capita         Life             Lifetime CO2
                           Kg/Year        Expectancy             tonnes                                                    
       Sudan              287                 50.3                     14.4
       Zambia           204                 38.5                       7.9
       Ethiopia         103                  50.4                      5.2
       Afghanistan   29                 43.9                       1.3
       Chad                  13                  48.3                      0.6
       Somalia             3                   50.7                     0.15
Some may  find the UN 's contention  that Somali's burn six ounces of fossil fuel a month unsustainable, but it has a certain internal logic. It is mighty warm in Somalia in June.

Still, the IAEA stats show the problem is not unique to Islam:

                                            CO2 per capita  KG            Life Expectancy         Lifetime Emission of CO2
  • USA                20,000             80.1                   1602.0
  • Paraguay        742                 78.0                    57.8   
  • Angola            505                  38.6                    19.5
  • Sudan              287                 50.3                     14.4
  • Zambia           204                 38.5                      7.9
  • Ethiopia         103                  50.4                      5.2
  • Rwanda           63                   50.1                      3.2
    Cambodia        39                  63.4                      2.5
    Afghanistan   29                 43.9                        1.3
    Chad                  13                  48.3                       0.6
  • Somalia             3                   50.7                       0.15


Thursday, June 18, 2015

REVIEWS OF POSTMODERN PHYSICS


Journal of  the  Modem  Language  Association         Vol XXI Winter 2014-15, p 79-81
Lexical forcing of optical & metaphoric depth in the  holocene  electoral  climate  op-ed  optimum
In  today's  climate of  opinion,  Marcuse's One  Dimensional  Editorial   Language  Model (MODELM)  has  grown in impertinence by  globally reifying  Hansen's  thesis that: “Truth is responsible for warming.”
In  dielectical contrast, the George Mason school of semiotics( CF Michaels & Singer, 2005) maintains it is less truth that is responsible for carbon dioxide, than the futile articulation of the warming paradigm as a signification of water vapor by the cis-socratics, e.g. Aristophanes  discussion of the iris effect and  sunlight focusing in Clouds and Frogs , and more recently, the esoteric climate hermeneutics of Lindzen and Fish. 
Decades before the term “global warming” became chic, semioticians focused on the prospect of a mini-Ice Age in consequence of MacLuhans postulation of cool media. Only when Lacan promoted the use of post-ecologistant reading to read and attack the lack of transgendered author titles in the style manual of The American Meteorological Society  did many realize that in the end, all temperature is text.
The post-Althuserian work of Baliunas  brings renewed emphasis to the concept of capitalist climate culture. In a sense, this mirrors Idoru, in which Gibson deconstructs climate constructivism; and the visual reification of the  ELM computer modeling paradigm in the solarized scenes of The Matrix Reloaded , which allude to the alienation of causality and metphysics in the modeling gestalt.
This is not lost on Vienna Circle structuralists like Siegfied Fred Singer, and naive Frankfurt School realists, who point out that denying the Ibsonian angst of An Inconvenient Truth affirms capitalist subdialectic stratosphere theory as a medium of semiosis.
Even if the alarmists’ claim that the earth’s temperature is  rising one microdegree an hour were conceded, pre-Lacanian models would still have failed to predict the significant cooling or lexical forcing of optical depth and metaphoric breadth that the oceans have undergone. This is antithetic to how global warming would be construed in popular culture were readers to choose Derridaist reading over the formalized carbonist nihilism of Viscount Monckton and Lord Bertrand Russell.
Why require the nations of this planet to spend the hundreds of billions of dollars necessary to reduce carbon dioxide and other emissions when it invites Althuserian anomie, and we face epistemic doubt as to whether temperature change caused by human activity is even more dangerous than transgressive texts entering the scientific canon? Consider the recent Papal encyclical , Laudatio Si.

“Consciousness is fundamentally dead,” says Foucault; however, with the advent of Artificiality computer models of climate may  transcend normative theology by singularizing into generators of their own hermeneutic hierarchy. According to Albi , it is not so much consciousness that is fundamentally dead, but rather the paradigm, and embodying parametric atmospheric models in sentient algorithms. This, Legates and McIntyre would say, embodies the absurdity of consciousness as a post-modeling condition. Therefore, Bataille uses the term ‘capitalist discourse’ to denote the difference between global warmism, sexual identity and cis-climatized culture in the post Cold War era. 
The main theme of the works of Hansen is transgressive because  the role of the climate  software  writer as observer. Hence the feminist discourse of Interior Secretary Bruce Babbit, who claimed that oil and coal companies in the U.S. have joined in a conspiracy to hire pseudo scientists to deny the facts in denial of  Habermas teaching that there are in fact none to falsify, thus concretizing McLuhan's global village even while leading to ozone depletion in the cybersphere.  
The primary theme of Buxton’s  model of the climate of capitalist subdialectic theory is the bridge between society and sexuality. Thus, the premise of constructivism states that society, surprisingly, has objective value. If  the Derridaist reading  of Gore's thesis holds, we have to choose between the  subconceptualist textual theory of logocentric radiative variability  espoused by Spencer, and a post-encyclical theory in which anthropogenic warming is no longer a signifier  of the miraculous.
If Heidigger never know that ancient lexa reduce to semantic monads, it is because of Soon et al's  paper in the Oregon Journal of Intertextual Climate Research, argued that there really had been a Medieval warm period. How has this anachronality of juxtaposition as dasein obviated temporal and lexical space in culturally framed post-Aristotelian models in contemporary America? 
Explaining how dasein has become a predominant concept in the distinction between figure and ground in  framing models in the popular imagination, Fish might say that Sontag uses the term ‘capitalist subdialectic theory’ to denote a self-falsifying  MODELM paradox like "global warmism" in ways paralleling the multi-dimensional nature of the IPCC paradigm, but reflecting Marcuse’s one dimensional man, Milloy and Limbaugh therefore imply that we have to choose between climatic relativism and modernist pretextual theory ,or else face the consequences of Moore's law as the climate of opinion faces hermeneutic decay as culture and cyberclimate merge.
Are post-structuralist alternatives to a Web 3.0 view of the climate debate too horrible to contemplate. Some fear the moral hazard of  recent Nobel Peace Prizes inspiring a Murdoch run for Stockholm in the footstems of Obama El-Baradei and Gore.

To deconstruct that contingency, this transgressive textual canon by has been articulated by running random excerpts from  Lingua Franca  and  Wall Street Journal editorials on climate change through the PoMo jargon generator 

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
If you want one, just send a contribution to defray page charges to mnestheus@paypal

Saturday, June 13, 2015

THE MIRROR CRACKED WHEN THE IRONY ALARM WENT OFF

The day after  Heartland Communications Director Jim Lakely ordered hotel security to remove accreditied British journlist  Brendan Montague journalist from the 10th International Climate conference, always Orwellian  coal booster Bob Carter's talk  included this  slide :

Another Heartland Director “refused to be drawn into a philosophical debate" as to how a"Libertarian " think tank could condone blacklisting:  Montague  was banned for criticising  Heartland's Vatican protest earlier this year.

MARK STEYN AND THE MEDIEVAL COOLER THAN NOW PERIOD

Mark Steyn harked back to Magna Carta at last weeks  Heartland Institute  Climate Conference :
"When I was a schoolboy we were taught that the England of 1215  was a degree or so warmer than today.  And vineyards were sown as far north as the Isle of Ely... a stones throw from where  the University of East Anglia Climatic Research Unit stands today,  the Climategate guys,  so I will take global warming seriously when they tear down the Climate Research Unit, and sow a vineyard making an amusing little Chateauneuf du Phil Jones.

But now, as in 1215, Scotland is five degrees north of East Anglia, and several  degrees  cooler than England.  So if as Mark says:

"the England of 1215  was a degree or so warmer than today.  And vineyards were sown as far north as the Isle of Ely..."  
the present production of wine in Scotland if anything demonstrates today's British climate to be "a degree or so warmer than...1215." 


Here's another swig of Mark's strange brew :
'It’s an elitist thing... They’re the ones who actually deny science. They basically took a jackhammer to a thousand years of sane scientific observation of natural climate variability of the Medieval Warm Period when they were making wine in Greenland,'     ( 22  April 2015 )

Next,  he'll  be  telling us  Erik the Red  sailed West  in search of fresh mango juice.  

Steyn's counterfactual tasting notes bode ill for his libel trial : grapes  never  grew in  medieval  Greenland ,  but  the Industrial Revolution did happen, and global warming in its wake has pushed  British winemaking north through grim Northumberland into, Heaven help us, Scotland!

While Steyn makes  crapulent  claims about winemaking in Greenland,  and charges those who doubt Vinland voyages prove global  medieval warming with suppressio veri,  canny Scots vignerons have been busy establishing vineyards closer to the Arctic Circle than the Isle of Ely.

Mark  may want to see the Climatic Research Unit torn down because it  overlooks Winbirri Vineyards. It really wouldn't do for his libel jury to sample the dead-ripe 2013 vintage  that testifies to the rise in  degree-days that has added 56  or more amusing little wines to the Cote du Jones lineup, including the eponymous Isle's Elysian Fields, where, the producer's note, 


 " There is documentary evidence that the monks at the Abbey and later the Cathedral at Ely cultivated vines right through the Middle Ages "
 To the dismay of deniers touting an erstwhile "pause," 2003 saw  Burgundy's earliest harvest since record keeping began in 1370- Chandon's Corton Charlemagne was picked on August 15,  the grapes having already ripened to the heady limit of fermentation- the wine was bottled at 14.5%  alcohol!  



Like many ersatz climate skeptics, Steyn  has  his history backwards; the medieval warm period simply  wasn't warm enough to grow wheat, let alone grapes, in Iceland or Greenland, witness how clerics there were forced  to  celebrate  mass  with items as alien to The Last Supper as oatcakes, ale and fermented crowberry juice.

Hearing of this heresy in 1237, Pope Gregory IX  told Archbishop Sigurd of Norway to order Greenland and Iceland's clergy to import the real deal in sacramentals--panis de frumento et vini de uvis from warmer climes,  a description  met by today's brae wine frae north o' the Doon.

While it's naughty of Mark to ignore Little Ice Age winemaking in Nova Scotia, I can't fault Matt Ridley leaving  his Northumbrian coal-lands  vineless : plantings on equally bituminous acres this side of the pond produce haggis-friendly wines with a scary witch hazel nose and terrifying hydrogen sulfide finish.  But for all the ginger he puts into it,  Mark Steyn's  fortified  hogwash merely strengthens the case for The Medieval Cooler Than Now Period.


 

Friday, June 12, 2015

KICKING THE BUCKET

As methods of measuring  sea surface   temperatures figure  prominently in the latest version of the recent climate record,  it should be pointed out that awareness of the need to  correct and homogenize  SST inputs from buckets and through-hull water intakes was noted years ago:

HIS NEXT SLIDE SHOWS GALILEO SIGNING THE OREGON PETITION

Having introduced  Willie Soon, David Legates  and Pat  Michaels as " Three  of  the  top  climate scientists   on  Fox  news  in  the  world "  Convicted  EPA  fraudster  Heartland Chief Scientist Jay Lehr raised the resume' padding ante by giving Willie a non-existant  Harvard appointment, and  touting him as:
" THE MOST FAMOUS CLIMATE SCIENTIST IN THE WORLD"
As can be seen, Willie's real claim to fame is putting words into Einstein's chalk as a  critic of global warming:
  " IPCC  =  gangster science "
It seems Willie and his new best friends are out to rewrite climate history yet again, with a paper combining rural Chinese climate stations, Anthony Watts' favorite American cold spots , and 'volunteer'  coauthors  Ronan and Donald  Connoly's data from the gale swept coast downwind of the coldest region of the North Atlantic to undo the idea of global temperatures rising due to AGW. Why?
Because  "there are sixty kinds of sunspots " and this is a Heartland Conference.

Roy Spencer made silly claims at the first one, and to encourage his patrons to pay for more batteries to bang the drums, Lehr revealed an interesting statistic about his employer of twenty years :
'I was the ninth hire  I think we have 42 people connected to Heartland now thanks to many of you who are  donors to our cause.' 
Stay tuned  to Desmogblog for what Willie had to say to their man on the spot before Heartland expelled him in a shocking lapse of P-R firm professional courtesy. 

Instead of embracing climate hypster Montague with the enthusiasm of an undertaker greeting a homeopath,  climate denier Joe Bast made him leave without hearing Jay Lehr's learned discourse on the dangers of Lysenkoism. 

Weirder still was the conference webmeter: how odd so anodyne a panel should out-draw the keynote address of an AGU meeting, but only 19 of 20,106 erstwhile live viewers should wish to follow it? 




Thursday, June 11, 2015

Wednesday, June 10, 2015

Sunday, June 7, 2015

TUAN KITINGAN ALSO THINK BIKINI CAUSE GLOBAL WARMING

KUALA LUMPUR, Malaysia —

Rescuers on Borneo's  highest peak, 12,000  foot  Kota Kinabalu, searched for six climbers after recovering 13 dead from a strong earthquake that trapped scores of trekkers last week. Most of the other climbers made it down the  tectonically active young mountain in the darkness early Saturday, some with broken limbs and one in a coma.

Sabah Deputy Chief Minister Joseph Pairin Kitingan blamed the tragic quake on a group of 10 foreigners who "showed disrespect to the sacred mountain" by posing naked at the peak. He said a special ritual would be conducted to "appease the mountain spirit."


Five of the tourists are believed to still be in Malaysia and will be barred from leaving on the offense of gross indecency, according to police.