HE MAKETH ME TO LIE DOWN IN GREEN PASTURES

FOR FOUR GRAND, JOE BAST WILL
GIVE YOU ONE TOO !

The intellectual calm of Las Vegas' was shattered last week as the spirit moved Doctor Calvin Beisner, a divine of strong Dominionist views to invade the Mandalay Bay Casino.

The dour Reverend Doctor came not to cast out the slot machines from that deeply shocking den of iniquity, but earn an honorarium by presiding at the baptism of  one of the Lord's preterite scientific sheep as the

of the year of Grace 2014. 

The Right Reverend  Calvin Beisner, Th D, dominie of

er, I mean the  Cornwall Alliance for the Stewardship of  Creation, did so at a  Heartland Institute  revival meeting  International Climate Conference event honoring the  Wrong-Way Corrigan of the Climate Wars, Dr. Roy Spencer, who preached the negative global temperature trend gospel in various learned journals  until deeper study of The Book Of Nature compelled him to recant  in Science in 2005.  

The Calvinist Coolist Conclave also featured Brit  Übertwit James Delingpole, and Austrian climate rapper as the show's hallelujah chorus.

At event's end, the Heartlandite brethren headed down the Strip like an exodus of Mormons fleeing Sodom for Gomorrah, to this year's Libertarian Freedomfest, where Delingpole praised Vegas as a wholesome and uplifting Evangelical convention venue:

"Great God, Vegas is an awful place... Everyone was fat and drunk and dressed for the beach... Everywhere had the style and charm and tastefulness of Redditch...

you can only survive Vegas if you learn to love it-- and to do that you must first sell it your soul... The reason I was there was to cover two conferences: first the Heartland Institute’s Climate Conference ... by day, I interviewed gold bugs, Ayn Rand junkies, Mises groupies and celebrities like Steve Forbes and P.J. O’Rourke. At night, I got totally wasted and had adventures.

My favourite was a trip to the Strip, the low-rent end of Vegas, where the clientele is poorer and trashier and the whores skankier... The tackier the better, really, because the more depraved and messed up everyone else looks, the less discomfited you are by your own growing squalor ...

Stage a conference of libertarians, pot-legalisers , gun nuts  and gold bugs  in  a  city of  booze,  whores,  gambling  and  semi-automatics: What could possibly go wrong?"