TRUMP COMMANDS MEXICO TO BUILD SPANISH MAIN SEAWALL TO FOIL THREAT OF ISLAMIC PIRATISM

Famed  Waterfront  Property  Buccaneer
Inaugurated  To  Preside  Over
Potomac  Fever -- Swamp  Fleet 

Sea  Level  Rise  Makes  Mar A Lago  Natural Base

 For  Dread  Privateer  Trump

The President ( be he kin o'the Dutch Admiral?) having by  Surprize got  the  weather  Gage  of  the  Low  Whig  candidate,  Mifstress Clinton, told  a  Capitol  quarterdeck  crowd  far  too large  to reckon  on  his  fingers  that,  for sure  as  a  rising  tide  lifts  all galleons, he  giveth not  the  Fig  of  Spain  for the huge  Flight of Whiggish  Lubbers, Liberals &  such-like  bilge rats flushed  down the  Virginee  Tidewater  from the fever swamps of the Potomock.

WE  BE  AN  EQUAL  OPPORTUNITY  SHANGHAIER

                     THE  PIRATE  SHIPPING  NEWS
Many an Aarrrgh!  has been heard  in  the Port O'New York 
of  late,  as the  China  Trade  be  run  hard &  fast Aground with bo'suns unable to find & Shanghai  enough  able-bodied  Heathens   to man the yards. 
As  Trump's  embargo  of  Barbarees,  Levanters  and  Lascaradoes leaves  none  for  press - gangs  to  belay,  a  Subscription  is  being raised at Fraunces Tavern,  to  article a  savvy  bilge-barrister   to survey Ye  Black  Book  of  Admiralty, and see  if  Bosun Bannon's scurvy Mussulman  ban  be  not contrary  to the Code.

New-Captured Logs    FOREIGN  PIRACY    Al Qaeda's been Codswalloped & Holystoned this side of Hormuz, But The Council On Foreign Pirations reports them Sallee ISIS marabouts have landed their poxy  Sinbad  Jihad  in  the  Hook of Holland, where the corsair  caliphate  hopes to hold  the Europarliament hostage for increased subsidies on xebec careenage & peg-leg repair. Ye Pyrate Law Review  Former  Harvard Law Review President interviews  Bofun Watts  USE IT TO READ THE SCIENCE  LITERATURE ?  WHY SINK ME, THIS BE ME THERMOMETER  READING  EYE !          NATURAL PIRACY MAGAZINE             Avast, Ye  Warmin'  Earthers!   The Fig of  Spain  to yer squally monsoon    n'mega-drought  scuttlebutt, sayeth Lord     Admiral   Monckton's   Senior   Gunner ,  Mister Ebell: if  it be  hot  in Madagascar,     why, man  the capstan, wear ship & tack        through  the  Northwest  Passage  to    plunder  the sea otter trade!  more>\ "BELAY YOUR JUNK SCIENCE!" Cap'n  Ken Haapala be ye Flying Finn what wants to helm NOAA, and keelhaul  draw & quarter warm water undeniers  thar. AVAST , AND  STOP  YER  PRESSES !  TIS  THE  FINN'S  BEEN  KEELHAULED  INSTEAD !  Piracy Has A Long & Brutal Ahoystory.   Admiralty   law   contains   useful   precedents  for counterterrorism. Due  process  is  paramount, so lay  aft  to  see  how  it  deals with Somali sea  dogs:  If  they  wears  the  Red  Sea  rig, We make'em dance th'hempen jig Democracy?  That chase be  making full sail, but good  Governance  before the  mast can include components besides   democratic   participation, says Francis Fukuyama. (Bloody landlubber!)  God looks after drunken bilge rats, children, and Old Ironsides, but on what strange tide did Cap'n Trump shanghai Palm Beach voters into orderin' a neocon legal agenda aloft into the riggin ? more»        Essays & Affadavys PIRENVIRONMENT MAKING PIRACY SUSTAINABLE The Institute for Advanced Filibustering suggests sensitivity training could help reduce ye carbon footprint of corsair coastal raids. A  doubloon blind study comparing Tunis arrack & Demerara rum hath revealed  hands  given  extra  grog  tend to  Rape, Pillage & Loot more, and are thus difposed to Burn  less.  JOURNAL OF  THE  MODERN   PIRACY  ASSOCIATION Them Frenchy Anthropocene Semioticians be askin' if quotation marks around decadal temperature averages be the new boldface?  Arrh, and  Cap'n Koonin's WSJ op-ed  be old & lame as  the smoked rats in  the  lobscouse  o'a  grog  shop  what  runs up  a  "Fine Food" burgee.  Don’t expect such usage to overhaul Bristol fashion English ... more»  Available in better grog shops coastwise The Weekly Black Flag Couch  Admiral  of  the  Red  States  Kristol wonders how yer Arab Left can openly embrace  Muslims listing  far  to  starboard ?.   says  Hussein Ibish, (By the Black Spot, that be a Barbary Boatswain sure) such matey gestures oft  be  returned  by a  poxy  kiss  o'Davey Jones camel more» The Paris Pirate Review Th’ doxy was dazzled  by Cap'n  Sartre’s  brilliance  as  a scuttlebut  philosopher.  For Simone  de Beauvoir, smart as paint  terms  like 'essence' , or  'contin'ency'  were like a  chest  O’gold pistoles' or a  carton  of  Habana  Disque Bleu  segarilloes ...   Booty can’t buy happiness.  Yet there be a strong correlation between the clime o' a country 'n its general level o' happiness, accordin to  Sigfried Singer. Senior Sawbones O' the K-Street pirate fleet.  But it's hard to believe hotter is better when the tar on yer hat starts to run...more» Antarctica be a red state.  March o' the Penguins ‘affirms more than Global Cooling- thar be norms O The Code like monogamy sacrifice'n child rearin'” says a critic. But some o' those penguins be gay... (Bilge!) Thar be genuine intensity in the sufferin' o' Frida Kahlo. Yet thar be somethin' vaguely repulsive in the adulation she receives.   Victimhood, aft all, be not beatitude... (Poxy landlubber!) more»   NEW GEAR FOR DAVY"S LOCKER: GUNNERS  RAVE OVER REVOLUTIONARY  METALLIC HYDROGEN CANNONBALLS  “ Sink me, n'I have felt it meself,” Freeman Dyson said.  “The glitter o' nuclear weapons.  It be  irresistible if ye come t' 'em as a scientist: an illusion o' illimitable   power.” Arrrh, Tis time for another broadside-- hail the powder monkey  to fetch 10 more kilotons from the magazine ..more»    Ebola ahoy ! Forget the Big Easy;  history be littered  with “eternal” cities brought low by flood or plague, and if the armpit of Africa gets any steamier Lagos may be next: The Black Spot to ’them as reprinteth this but as by the Code, first send doubloons to ye Paypal account of    Mnestheus@aol.com                     Copyright MMVII