Social Distance yourself with Green Halloween costumes
1. Al The Anthropocene Underdog
Call archivist at the Gore Former Next Presidential library, and be the first to ask to borrow the Underdog costume Al wore to the Halloween party preceding the 2000 election.
2. Rising C Levels
Extinction Rebellion and existential threat fans can attach collars of rising C's to sea blue T-shirts listing US cities that sea level rise of biblical proportions will inundate by 2100.
High end revelers can adorn their Statue of Liberty costumes with fronds of seaweed and solar panels to power energy-efficient Liberty's new LED torch
3. Snorri The Snorkeling Polar Bear
A-list climate deniers may don white pants, shirt & gloves. Sew ears on white ski cap. Apply black shoe polish to tip of nose, unless Pierre Trudeau has been invited, and accessorize with snorkel, goggles, and inner tube.
Dress children identically, and equip with "Cub at risk" placards
4. Batmange
Put cliche' Draculas to shame with a costume far more terrifying. Recycle a broken black umbrella into bat wings & ears, and glue cotton to nose to convey rhe horror of the warming-driven fungal white-nose mange syndrome that has decimated batcaves in nine states, and threatens massive crop losses through falling guano supplies.
5. The Greenwashing Hulk
Paint face green after donning Hulk-style ripped shirt over sumo suit. Carry green paint can & paintbrush with "Eco-friendly" and "100% Retarded Materials" labels.
B-list climate deniers may be able to pull this look off without makeup.
