THE ANTHROPOCENE ? IT'S GREEK TO ME

THE ANTHROPOCENE EPOCH

 SITS ATOP  THE THEOGENE,  TITANOCENE AND  CLASSICAL ERAS
POSTMODERN GEOLOGISTS DIGGING DEEP INTO
 THE  SEMIOTIC COLUMN  
HAVE UNEARTHED A BOOK OF CAUTIONARY FABLES ABOUT 
THE PRECAUTIONARY PRINCIPLE BASED ON LUCIAN'S 

 THAT PROVES THE  CLIMATE  WARS  ANTEDATE  THE  FALL OF TROY:  

THE  FRONTISPIECE OF  DE BELLO CLIMATICO, SHOWING  THE EARLIEST KNOWN  GLOBAL CLIMATE MODEL,  PROJECTING PANTHEOGENIC CLIMATE CHANGE  FROM 101 TO 1 BC,
FROM CAM- I RUNS ON  THE ANTIKYTHERA  MACHINE 

 Its invocation of the Climate Gods begins with 

 Interpantheonic Paean to  Climate  Change 

a hymn hailing Zeus, Father of Gods and men ,

  for commissioning Hephaestus to build the 

Antikythera  2-D Analog Cosmos Model

to  help the Pantheon confront the threat of

Hellenic  warming from thunderbolt doubling 

at the end of The Titanocene Era.

It tells  of how foam-footed Aphrodite 

struck far-seeing Icarus, systems  programmer

  of the Gods, with  love for  Phoebe, 

 muse of  solar  radiation  management,

and how when it failed to calculate thunderbolt doubling sensitivity,

Shining-browed Phoebe jilted far-seeing  Icarus, who took flight and threw the brazen Cosmos model

 into the wine-dark Antikytheran sea

to placate earth-shaking Poseidon's wrath

at the mere mortals who sacrilegiously

sang the praises of ambrosia rationing

and Net Zero goals on sacrificing hecatombs

 of swift-burning oxen whose rising smoke

is pleasing to the Gods.

De Bello Climatico  ends on a tragic note, with the
extinction  of  the  entire  Greek  Pantheon, and its replacement by an assortment of post-Etruscan New Age ' monotheistic ' religions, like the dread and bloody ISIS cult,  which explains the work's  Aesopian  moral :